Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
