does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
