so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
