remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize