I wanna passion pit in your ass
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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