More tranny stories later!
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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