Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
either way he was missing a nipple.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
