Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
We had to coat check the pizza.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
