i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize
