marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I wanna bring you to show and tell
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
