put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
