My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just want nice things and good sex
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
