He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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