Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
