I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
