this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
you would pick up someone in the library
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
