have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
