So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
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