Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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