At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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