Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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