it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
