wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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