You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
one might say we're banned from that church
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
