Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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