Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
