That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Please, let me fuck your mom
I'm passing your future prison.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
