it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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