so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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