last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
