Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
