so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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