Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
