summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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