I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
