You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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