Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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