And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
