i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
