Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
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