Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
this is an emotional support booty call
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
