You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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