she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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