His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
