pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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