So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize
