I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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