This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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