She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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