So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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