so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
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