At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
